posted November 23, 2009 12:19 PM PST

Help me rob you

Here's a pro-tip for any would be credit card thieves among us: If you try to buy shit online, it won't work unless you use the correct billing address.

We had this guy over the weekend try to place an order using an obviously bogus credit card. Wait, correction: We had this guy over the weekend try to place an order using six different obviously bogus credit cards. Each time he tried to place an order, he used a different card number along with different billing and shipping addresses. The shipping address was always the same, but the billing addresses weren't. It was obviously fraudulent.

Not a big deal. The system is designed to see things this obvious, and deny them. Newsflash: The credit card company knows what the billing address on the card is supposed to be. If a charge is going through as "cardholder not present" then the address MUST match.

But here's where it gets funny. The guy has the balls to contact our customer support desk and ask us for help. Here's the back and forth that we had about it: (he is in bold, we are not)

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Email:  b*****@******.bm (.bm is Bermuda)
Subject:  website sales

Message:
I have tried to order from your website with three different credit cards that i use all the time online. Every time i get the same error avs mismatch. Is there anyway you can assist me?
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Please ensure you use a valid credit card and the proper ship address, or use paypal
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So there is no way you can help me other than that. Paypal is not safe so I will not use it .
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We've been replying to your emails for several days. If you are not using a valid card with the correct shipping address, it is not safe for us.  Paypal is safe, but if you are unwilling to use it, then there is nothing I can do for you.
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Ok thanks I will use utorrent
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Either way, you are a thief.  Thanks!
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And then a few hours after he sent that last message, he tried a couple more times. Obviously because he couldn't find what he was looking for on bittorrent.

What an idiot.

last updated November 23, 2009 12:36 PM PST