posted November 5, 2008 11:33 AM PST

Jamaica

Allow me to preface by saying that I did not go to Jamaica. I went to an all-inclusive resort within the borders of Jamaica. There is no mistaking that the experience I had for the past week was unlike anything a Jamaican will go through at any point in their life. The bus trip to and from the airport, and the one brief excursion outside the resort were the only glimpses we had of the real Jamaica. We had planned more trips, but they were canceled due to weather or other people canceling at the last minute. Because I don't even trust cab drivers in the states, there was no way I was going to just hop in a cab and jet around the northern part of the island on my own either. At least, not without a local by my side.

But in spite of that, I still feel like I got more out of it than just being waited on and having my ass kissed for a week. I managed to catch a few of the resort employees with their guards down, and one of our tour guides (hiked up a mountain, zip-lined down) was actually quite candid about Jamaican politics and the tourism industry. Being able to understand a little bit of patois helped... although they speak so fast that half the time I had to ask them to repeat themselves.

I'm not trying to kid myself that everybody in Jamaica is happy to see me. The people I encountered were genuinely friendly, but that is also the only reason I encountered them. If you're trying to get a job at a resort that caters to rich americans and europeans, you better have the attitude for it. Poverty is insane over there, and from the looks of the cars they drove, the resort employees are well paid to be nice to the bakras. I enjoyed my time there, but I'd be lying if I said that there wasn't always an underlying sense of guilt associated with it. I shouldn't really feel that way, because my money helps put food on tables and that kind of shit... but at the same time it cheapens and waters down their culture. Why go to a foreign destination only to stay locked up in a cultural prison, isolated from the very culture you travelled so far to see? And really, that's what it was. The gift shop sold all sorts of "Yea mon", "Feelin' Irie" and "No Problem mon" T-shirts... along with enough Bob Marley branded crap to make Haile Selassie himself roll over in his grave. That's not Jamaica. That's just the foreign impression of Jamaica, and serving this shit up on a platter to the tourists only reinforces that crap. So it's a tough call. The money helps the country, but it hurts the culture.

At the end of the day, I just had to tell myself that I was really only there for the resort experience, and not the Jamaican experience. And that certainly was one hell of a resort experience. Never done anything like that in my life. And also, just gotta say that I was super stoked by how available vegetarian food is in Jamaica. For some reason I keep forgetting that Rastas are vegetarian.

last updated November 5, 2008 12:10 PM PST

posted November 5, 2008 12:14 PM PST

are you recommending the Hedonism resort, or not?
sconsinite

sconsinite is currently offline

posted November 5, 2008 12:42 PM PST

Actually, the place we stayed at was next to one of the Hedonism resorts I think. That just sounds gross to me... a bunch of old people walking around naked, and fucking in public. No thanks. If there was an age limit, maybe.
slacker

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posted November 6, 2008 9:14 AM PST

Actually, the money the resort makes does not really go back in to the country. The resorts there are owned by Americans, French, and Italians. They do not pay taxes, use goods from Jamaica (all of the fruit you ate was imported), or give money to the island except for the pay they give their employees. I can get those figures for you.
lisa

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posted November 7, 2008 8:54 AM PST

I think it's funny that everyone has a name like Neil, Bob, Sue or Fred.
xscralatchticax

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posted November 10, 2008 11:11 AM PST

Actually I have to say I was expecting them to use mostly imported products, but was pleasantly surprised to see how much of it came from Jamaica or elsewhere in the west indies. All of the alcoholic beverages were from jamaica (even the vodka) with the exception of the scotch. All of the soda & juice too. The bananas and pineapple were local, and so was the chicken, goat and fish. it seemed that the only imported food was stuff that couldn't be found locally.
slacker

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posted November 26, 2008 4:39 AM PST

so by 'catching the employees with their guard down' and am i right to assume that means 'scored some green off of'?
GroundChuck

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